Can Advice Be Junk Mail

Has someone’s advice shaped your life in a good way? That’s fantastic but have you also received your share of bad advice? Advice can take the form of junk mail

We all remember the good advice we’ve received and perhaps that makes us eager to share our own advice with others. We want to “pass on” the positives.

The result is that there is an all you can eat buffet of questionable advice and you may feel like you’re holding an overflowing plate.

To Clear the Path to less mental indigestion, consider these factors when it comes to advice:

Perspective: If you love cats and I love dogs, do we see the world the same way? The same goes for an accountant and painter. No one person’s perspective is wrong but it’s filtered through a subjective lens. Make sure you understand the other person’s world before accepting advice from him or her.

Still Useful: Sometimes people will give you out of date advice. When I was new in town, I asked a friend if she knew a good doctor. She advised me to visit her doctor.

About three months later, I told my friend that the doctor wasn’t too good and I was thinking of switching to another one. I was surprised that she told me that she had stopped going to that doctor a long time ago.

I asked, “Why did you send me to a doctor you didn’t like?” but my friend only gave me a blank stare.

Today I wonder if it’s because we are so excited to be asked for our advice that we feel that if we say nothing, then we’ll burst into flames. “I don’t know,” is an acceptable response.

Need Affirmation: At times the person who is asking for advice is actually looking for affirmation.

If I’m asked, “Should I eat nothing but grapes for the next year,” I’m likely to say, “No, eat a well balanced diet.” The other person then says, “You just don’t understand the grape diet.”

So why was my advice solicited? Because someone wanted me to say that grapes are the only food you need to eat. When I didn’t, I was dismissed as being the source of bad advice.

Do You Really Need Other People’s Advice: When a situation arises where you feel you need help, try this trick: Pretend that someone else has approached you with the same problem. Make this someone you care about. What would you tell him or her to do?

Once you have that answer, follow your own advice. If it’s good enough for someone you care about, then it should be good enough for you.